Hey Pumpkin! How’s my beautiful kitty kitty?
Hey listen…we need to talk.
You know I love you, right? I mean, didn’t I rescue you from the vet and pick the crusted poop off your butt when you were sick? Don’t I let you knead on belly every night and sleep by my feet. And let’s not forget that whole peeing on the bathroom rug episode this past Spring…if it was up to Daddy, you’d still be locked in basement.
So here’s the thing. I know it’s August and it’s been awfully hot. I get that. And I feel like I’ve been really tolerant of your shedding all over the house. I haven’t complained too much about the little fur balls on every, blessed step of the staircase.
And I haven’t been on your case about the little tufts of hair you leave all over the furniture.
But honestly, we’ve got to talk about all this rolling around on the entry rug.
I know it feels good when you scratch your back…
…but COME ON – this is so disgusting! And it’s right at the front door for everyone to see! It’s so embarrassing. And it’s making me not want to hang out with you as much.
So look, I promise not to get bent out of shape when you leave hair all over my black shorts if you’ll try harder to keep off the rug.
Thanks for listening. I’m glad we had this little talk.